ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I believe in your delicious
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Randomize
