I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
