i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Just high enough for therapy.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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