in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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