I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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