You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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