So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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