U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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