i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
porn star boner night. come get it.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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