just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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