i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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