weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
My vagina is very pro this idea
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Randomize
