Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Randomize
