you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
