Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Randomize
