is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
It's just like the Real World with babies
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Randomize
