Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Randomize
