Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Randomize
