just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
