The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
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