I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
