didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Randomize
