My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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