Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Randomize