remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
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