i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
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