? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Randomize