Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
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