Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
