I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Randomize
