I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
These tits shall not be calmed
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Randomize
