I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
