Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize
