I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
