ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
