i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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