so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
