I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize