She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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