Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Randomize
