Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
