I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
