My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
