Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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