That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
