my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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