He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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