Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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