...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Randomize
