White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Randomize
